Wednesday, January 03, 2007

All is Well

Recently I've made the decision to cut the umbilical cord and quit my full time job at NBC News in order to be a filmmaker full time. Just that simple decision brought up a lot of fear and anxiety that is beyond the realm of what is rational.

Sometimes I would feel exhilerated, like this was the beginning to my real life. Like I was ready to take off like a rocket booster. Other times, I would ride the subway and look at all the New Yorkers around me, wondering how come they can be comfortable and secure and I cannot.

My mother, who is part of the minority of people in this country who have experienced losing everything, said to me, "I can't believe I have a daughter who might be homeless." That comment didn't help things.

But what I've resolved for myself is that there's a real difference between getting paid for your performance versus getting paid for your time. I'll never measured for my performance in this particular job. It's like a golden glass ceiling.

So here I go stepping into the unknown. And I choose to step into it from all is and will be well.

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